Thursday, March 30, 2006

Lies I should have told while giving tours of the Capitol Building

While talking to a friend tonight, we were talking about giving tours of the Capitol Building to 8th graders and how they never pay attention anyway...

"If you come this way I'll show you where the nukes are kept..."

"Did you know that if you whisper on this square right here, they can hear you in Russia? Try it out..."

"This is where John Adams signed the famous treaty with the space aliens, allowing our cattle to be abducted... 10 years later they broke the treaty by abducting Arron Burr and replacing him with a robot."

"Little known fact, at night, Abraham Lincoln would sleep in the rafters over there..."

"This is the Senate Rotunda, originally used for cage fighting. It is also where Henry Clay met his untimely demise."

"The Senators play freeze tag on wednesdays, if you see one make sure you tag them before they get you or you'll have to stand there the rest of the day."

"This is the hall of columns, this is the dome of... height, this is the room of marble, this is the room of curtains and that's the soda pool."

"It is tradition that when entering Statuary Hall you must remove your shoes so as not to offend the statue of King Kamehameha, and your socks..."

"Some people say there's ghosts that still haunt the Capitol building. That of course is just a bunch of baloney, it's really just kids who were left behind because they asked too many questions, I'm looking at you bobby."


Anonymous dontEATnachos said...

Ok, nice snazzy new graphic there. Getting a little better with the photoshop, aren't we?

also, I'm offended by your word verification. The word it asked me to spell out: jz bag guk ... (spaces added by me)

1:12 AM, March 31, 2006  

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